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At the risk of insulting the nearly 8,700,000 residents of the Garden State, I should explain that I was raised along the Jersey shore. I graduated from Red Bank High and spent many summers at the Driftwood Beach Club in Sea Bright. But as soon as I could muster the courage, I left that overcrowded, haven for the Sopranos, behind in 1976, and moved to the desert resort community of Scottsdale, Arizona. It only took a few years to rid myself of the telltale Eastern accent and acclimate to sunny days, wide-open spaces, and toll-free roadways.
While I’ve only touched on some of the reasons I departed the home of cranberry bogs and Bruce Springsteen, suffice it to say I left also left my snow shovel in the garage when I sold the house and never looked back. After all, winters in Scottsdale average near 70 degrees. I did enjoy a few aspects of shore living but not enough to keep me there. But enough about that part of the country. This article is really about what makes us crazy. Being from NJ was a beginning, but not entirely responsible for my current disabled behavior.
I don’t remember much about the Jersey drivers but I imagine they can’t be much worse than what I encounter daily in the West. It amazes me how most got their licenses. Was there some sort of online exam they could take that I missed? What else could account for their immature, uncourteous, lack of skills, and common sense? How can someone drive with no apparent realization that there are actually other drivers on the road? How can they make unique turns, sudden stops, and disturbing instantaneous speed changes that defy most laws of physics? I’m obviously one of the only drivers not vision-impaired and somewhat conscious of most of the rules of the road. That’s some sort of disability in itself, if one is to survive the snarl of unending traffic.
Another problem I possess is the inability to express myself properly. The other day I pulled into a well-known, fast-food, place’s drive-thru and ordered my usual ‘chicken taco salad.’ I assume they heard me because they asked if I wanted “haormadsews” which I translated on prior trips to say, “hot-or-mild sauce.” I declined, as I always do, and picked up my order. As I pulled away, I peered into the bag to discover a cheeseburger with fries. Why would that include “haormadsews” anyway, I thought? Pulling back around, I now spent and additional twenty minutes going into the restaurant, waiting in line and finally getting my correct order. Instead of apologizing, the clerk inform me I must have said something that sounded like “cheeseburger.” To which I replied, “Chicken taco salad” could, if one were, say, Chinese, sound EXACTLY like “cheeseburger.” Chalk up disability number three.
I have to admit that I have a fourth disability that is equally troublesome: failure to recognize the true problem. I’ve purchased a variety of domains and hosting sites online and had numerous problems. When I call for technical support usually one of the following occurs. I wait on hold for 30 minutes to discover the office is closed and I’m invited to leave a number or visit their site for FAQ’s or technical assistance. I’ve left many messages, which were ignored, so I call back. Now I get a nice gentleman named Sabu in Bombay, India. Although he is quite polite, he has an accent that could bring Professor Henry Higgins to his knees. I ask him to repeat every answer many times and still can’t figure out what he’s saying. Eventually, I realize the futility of the situation and hang up. Then he sends an e-mail apologizing for the communication problem and detailing my real problem: my computer’s probably out of memory.
So I dash to my local computer dealer (another national chain) and they sell me more memory. Back home, nothing works. I return to the shop and they sell me a new hard drive. Home again, still no luck. Four hundred dollars and several other parts later, they tell me to get a whole new computer and no, they won’t give me a refund on the “used” parts they sold me just two days ago. So I bite the bullet, buy a new computer, but not from them, the greedy #$%@*!
So maybe this counts as disability five: the one where I can’t see when I’m getting taken to the cleaners and have “sucker” stamped on my forehead.
I have a plethora of other disabilities that cause me daily consternation: I’m stupid, at least according to some relatives (although I possess two degrees); cheap, according to e-mails offering penis enlargements that I won’t purchase; not financially smart, because I ignore all the refinance-your-mortgage offers I receive in the mail (even though I don’t have a mortgage); and ignorant, because I purchased a pathetic Civic instead of a hot Hummer and laugh about rising gas prices (it also helps that I work out of the home and hardly drive at all).
So, with all these disabilities, it’s hard to believe I can function at all. I must have no life or chose to be oblivious to everything that goes on around me. Yet, even with these flaws, I will continue to attempt to order salads and troubleshoot computer glitches. Did I forget to mention I just got back from the Post Office with a small package that was prepaid for a return? After the clerk got off the floor from laughing so hard at the two-dollar postage on the label, I just had to ask what was the matter. Then he then told me it would be another five dollars and what the heck was I thinking? That’s about par for the course, I reckon.
That said, I still will not allow a few behavioral problems to keep me from my daily functions. So join with me in my crusade to overcome our disabilities and strive for our survival. In my particular case, it’s my way of saying to the world, “even though I’m from Jersey, I can take everything you can dish out!”
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Until recently, the very mention of erectile dysfunction or impotence could bring about a blush to even the most manly of men. Embarrassing as it may be, erectile dysfunction affects more than 18 million men in America. It can vary in severity from an inability to achieve, maintain and sustain an erection, to an inability to achieve an orgasm, even though a healthy sexual desire exists. Because of the sensitive nature of this disorder, it often goes unreported.
Achieving a normal erection is a complex process. It involves psychological impulses from the brain, adequate levels of testosterone (male sex hormone), a functioning nervous system, and healthy vascular tissue of the penis. Electrical impulses from the brain, when stimulated, cause the nerves in the penis to release nitric oxide. This, in turn, increases the production of guanylate MonoPhosphate (cGMP) in the muscle cells of the corpora cavernosa (the tissue of the penis, consisting of smooth muscles, fibrous tissues, spaces, veins and arteries). The cGMP triggers the muscles of the corpora cavernosa to relax and fill with blood, which causes the penis to expand.
Because of the intricate nature of the physiological processes involved, a number of different factors can interfere with a man’s ability to achieve a normal and healthy erection. The most common of these is aging. As a man gets older, his ability to produce nitric oxide decreases, thus affecting the proper functioning of the corpora cavernosa.
A number of health issues can also underscore this disorder. The most frequently seen are diabetes mellitus and hypertension. Diabetes, for example, can damage the sensory nerves in the body. In turn, individuals who suffer from hypertension exhibit low nitric oxide production. Other factors that can contribute to erectile dysfunction include cardiovascular disease, nerve or spinal cord damage, cigarette smoking, low testosterone levels, prescription medications, depression, stress and anxiety.
Until recently, it was believed that little could be done to help a man who is suffering from erectile dysfunction, but there are a number of natural alternative health remedies that can be tried before having to rely on the “little blue pill”.
Recommendations For Wellness
If you think your stress, anxiety or depression is affecting you physically, perhaps psychological counseling, meditation, bio-feedback or hypnotherapy can help.
If you are taking prescription medications such as MAO inhibitors or anti-hypertensives, talk to your doctor about their possible side effects.
Have your hormone levels checked. You might be suffering from low testosterone levels. In some men, low levels of the hormone dehydroepiandrosterone (DHEA) have also been reported. DHEA is essential for the production of testosterone.
Quit smoking.
Try supplementing with the amino acid L-arginine. Nitric oxide formation depends on sufficient levels of L-arginine in the body and has been found particularly effective for men with abnormal nitric oxide metabolism.
Yohimbe bark has a history of helping men with erectile dysfunction. Yohimbe dilates blood vessels and may help regardless of the underlying cause. If you are on prescription medications, talk to your doctor before taking yohimbe.
Muria puama can be used to increase the libido and erectile strength. It works best when combined with yohimbe bark. This combination can be found in Nature’s Sunshine’s X-Action for Men.
In Mexico, the herb damiana is used as a male aphrodisiac and is an herb traditionally recommended for men with erectile dysfunction.
In Peru, maca is known as a potent aphrodisiac. Maca is often called the herbal “Viagra” and does not alter circulation. Instead it works to regulate hormones and bring the body back into balance.
Asian (panax) ginseng is an herb that has long been used to support male potency.
Sarsaparilla has a history of being used as a tonic for male sexual potency and is thought to assist in the production of testosterone.
Some men find relief when taking ginkgo biloba. Ginkgo biloba supports blood circulation and may help by increasing blood flow to the penis. This supplement is not recommended if you are taking any kind of prescription blood thinner.
Traditionally used to lessen the symptoms of an enlarged prostate, saw palmetto stimulates a low libido and increases sexual energy.
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Do you know what Crohn’s disease is? It is a chronic inflammatory disorder that causes ulcerations in the small and large intestines. This happens when the body tissues are attacked by its own immune system. Recently a study published in The Lancet says that Crohn’s disease is caused by a weak immune response and Viagra can be of help in this condition.
A group of researchers in the University College London, UK found out a new reason behind the inflammation in Crohn’s. They tested inflammatory response to bacteria by injecting harmless Escherichia Coli under the skin to measure local inflammatory and blood flow changes. Their investigation showed that the Crohn’s patients had very low blood flow producing lower quantities of neutrophils and inflammatory mediators. The problem with low blood flow, they suggest, can be treated with Sildenafil Citrate. According to Anthony Segal, the main researcher, in Crohn's disease, a constitutionally weak immune response predisposes to accumulation of intestinal contents that breach the mucosal barrier of the bowel wall, causing granuloma formation and chronic inflammation.
An increased blood flow may increase the immune response in the body and help in treating the Crohn’s disease. The diamond shaped blue pill Viagra, with its main ingredient Sildenafil Citrate, till today, was well known for the treatment of erectile dysfunction. Later, we knew that Viagra can be a good treatment for enlarged heart condition. There are a lot of diseases associated with blood flow and nitric oxide in human body. Viagra has sensed the need to have a control over human body fluid and have been able to control it when required.
Viagra is a PDE5 inhibitor that inhibits the reduction of enzyme guanylate cyclase which is responsible for the penile erection. This is because the relaxed penile muscles induce increased blood flow to the corpus cavernosum and engorge the penile section with blood resulting in a firm and hardened penis. With Viagra, it becomes easy to attain and sustain a penile erection.
The amazing fact about Viagra is, the compound was studied initially as a treatment of heart related diseases. It was by chance found very affective in improving the penis erectile functions. This mechanism of Sildenafil Citrate did what no other drug could do. It addressed the problem of mail impotence for the first time and proved that it is like any other physical condition which can be treated with medications.
Slowly researchers from the different corners of the world have found out the potentials of the wonder drug. It can protect the heart from the damages of heart attack and stroke; it has been prescribed for the rare heart conditions, recommended for women with diabetes and even for stimulating brain function. Now the latest being Crohn’s disease, Sildenafil seems to be a magic pill created by Pfizer for the purpose of healing the human ailments. God bless Viagra and Viagra maker; long live the blessed human race!
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Here are over 100 ideas to help you keep monogamy hot!
1. Find out what music your lover likes, and play it.
2. Sing to each other, especially if you can't sing. Listen to a song that turns you on and write the words out so you will remember them. Then without any music sing that song as a surprise gift to your lover. Watch the tears come to their eyes.
3. Find out what scents your lover likes, e.g., perfumes and especially essential oils. Get an essential oil diffuser.
4. Wear the clothes your lover likes. Try something wild in latex.
5. Serve the food your lover likes.
6. Select locations for lovemaking that your partner likes.
7. Prepare yourself for stimulating conversation. Do some homework if necessary to have something interesting to talk about.
8. Give lots of compliments on a regular basis.
9. Compliment you lover in front of others.
10. Tell each other all the things you like and appreciate about each other. Do this every day.
11. Show your body to your lover. Let them look as long as they like.
12. Take your clothes off while your lover watches.
13. Tease your partner with partial nudity at unexpected times, like when your mother or children are in the other room. Be artful and naughty about it so only your lover sees you.
14. Explore each other's bodies with your eyes, hands and tongues.
15. Hold a mirror for your partner to look at their own genitals.
16. Women, touch your lover's genitals with sighs of desire from time to time, even when out in public (discretely).
17. Men, nibble on your partner's neck with sighs of desire from time to time, even when out in public.
18. Give each other a sensual massage. Try short 5 minute full body massages on a daily basis, as well as longer versions (one hour or longer) when time permits. Use an exotic massage oil. You can mix some yourself with an excellent essential oil in a base of first cold press grapeseed (canola) oil.
19. Create a temple-of-love space in anticipation of your lovemaking. Make your space beautiful. Keep it simple.
20. Create your own rituals & ceremonies. Keep it simple.
21. Tell each other what turns you on. If they don't know they can't give it to you.
22. Read and/or write erotic poetry and stories.
23. Watch erotic, romantic movies and videos.
24. Take a bath or shower together. Even small tubs are great fun. Make a mess.
25. Wash each other's bodies. Be kind and gentle and provocative, or raucous and wild, whatever you're both into.
26. Wash each other's feet. Use a small dishpan and some wonderful natural soap. Rub on an aromatic foot lotion.
27. Suck on your partner's squeaky-clean toes.
28. Feed each other food and drink. Use your fingers. Make a mess.
29. Read stories out loud to each other.
30. Wear costumes and masks as part of your foreplay. Oooh, mystery!
31. Tie each other up. Men especially love to be tied up.
32. Paint each other's bodies. Use washable/edible body paint or chocolate sauce you make yourself or buy.
33. Wash each other's hair.
34. Give each other pedicures.
35. Prepare sensual meals together. Fondle and tease each other as you work/play.
36. Watch the sun come up or go down, or the moon go across the water.
37. Lie out under the stars. Sleep out under the stars.
38. Make flower arrangements together, fresh or dried.
39. Send each other erotic post cards without any special occasion.
40. Write love letters to each other.
41. Say the words "I love you. I need you. I want you."
42. Whisper words of adoration in your lover's ears before, during and after love making.
43. Talk "dirty" in your lover's ears in the heat of passion during your lovemaking.
44. Hold hands in public.
45. Go on picnics.
46. Call each other by "sucky" pet names.
47. Make foreplay go on and on and on and on and....
48. Men, help your woman come to orgasm before intercourse - at least some times!
49. Men, be sure she is wet, before you put your golden rod into her fig pocket!
50. Romance each other for hours, with intercourse on and off the whole time. Men, learn to delay ejaculation!
51. Cuddle after intercourse. Look into each other's eyes. Say words of love and adoration. Thank the God and Goddess for their favors.
52. Cry in front of each other.
53. Share what you are feeling. Risk being vulnerable.
54. Try different lovemaking positions. Experiment.
55. Try different lovemaking locations. Experiment.
56. Use love toys. Experiment.
57. Laugh during intercourse. Laugh before intercourse. Laugh after intercourse.
58. Offer unexpected gifts. Keep it simple, but thoughtful. Pick the right thing, not the biggest or most expensive thing.
59. Remember special occasions. Special occasions should be special!
60. Say please and thank you for sexual favors and for many small things each day. “Whether the pretty woman grants or withholds her favors, she always likes to be asked for them.” Ovid
61. Surprise your lover with the unexpected. Experiment.
62. Try something new. Experiment.
63. Try something dangerous. Experiment.
64. Try something outrageous. Experiment.
65. Try something kinky. Experiment.
66. Try something you are afraid of. Experiment.
67. Try something forbidden. Experiment.
68. Share your fantasies. Act them out with each other. Don't ever share fantasies about someone else with your lover!
69. Masturbate each other.
70. Masturbate in front of each other.
71. Dress up for a romantic dinner.
72. Eat dinner by candlelight.
73. Make love by candlelight.
74. Put on little skits (acts) for each other. Experiment.
75. Be foolish and playful. Experiment.
76. Drop something that is really important for you to do, and make love instead.
77. Call when you are away and say "I miss you terribly. I can't wait to get home to hold you."
78. Talk "dirty" over the phone to each other.
79. Shop for sex toys and lingerie together.
80. Ladies, wear garter belt and stockings instead of pantyhose.
81. Put blindfolds on each other during foreplay and intercourse, sometimes.
82. Role play: innocent high school student, slut, nurse, stripper, master, slave, bad boy or girl, etc.
83. Look into each other's eyes, if possible until tears follow the opening of your heart in love.
84. Match the rhythm of your breathing during lovemaking.
85. Take rapid breaths to heat up your excitement.
86. Take long, deep, slow breaths to maintain a high level of excitement without going over into orgasm. Prolonging the orgasmic excitement leads to ecstasy.
87. Just hold each other.
88. Talk where one only listens. The one who listens does not try to take any responsibility, does not try to intervene or "fix" anything. Just listen. This is harder to do than it sounds.
89. Give each other a 10-second kiss when coming and going.
90. Make out like high school kids, without intercourse.
91. Practice Tantra Sacred Sex muscle control, breathing and visualization together. If you don't know how, take a workshop together.
92. Give each other flowers regularly. Men love to receive flowers too!
93. Have fresh flowers around as often as possible.
94. Have lots of green healthy plants in the house.
95. Notice all the little things you do for each other, that you regularly take for granted, and let each other know how important they are to you. Show your appreciation.
96. Spend time remembering wondrous past experiences together when you were happy and joyous.
97. Take turns leading when dancing slow.
98. In conversation always use loving names when referring to your genitals, e.g., jade stalk, wand of light, mystery cave, succulent flower, etc.
99. Make plans for the future.
100. Talk about spending the rest of your life together.
101. Write out your vision for the kind of relationship you want to create together.
102. Display your relationship vision/dream where you will see it often.
103. Serve each other breakfast in bed.
104. Sleep together NAKED! Curl around each other like spoons. Roll over together to change positions in the night.
105. In the morning when you wake up lying naked together, the man goes between the woman’s legs. If he is not aroused, he will use the soft entry by wetting his penis with saliva (or any suitable lubricant such as water based or silicone lubricants, or any cooking oil) and inserting it into her vagina. Lie still with your eyes open and match your breathing for 2-5 minutes.
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Sex provides the very much required excitement in our life. It is a factor which can strengthen or weaken a relationship between two sex partners. Erectile dysfunction is one of the reasons which have caused strained relationships. It is defined as man’s inability to get enough erection to have successful sexual intercourse. If this problem is encountered occasionally then there is nothing much to worry about. Whereas, if it is a regular problem identified as impotency, then it is a serious health concern. The probability of having erectile dysfunction increases with age. Although this problem can be seen at any age but as per data 5 to 25% of men get affected by it in the age group of 40 to 65 years. This can shoot up to 50% by the age of 70 years.
Erectile dysfunction can be caused due to physical or psychological factors or both. The erection process involves a sequence of events within the body involving brain, spinal column, veins and arteries in the penis. Erection will not be possible if this process gets disrupted at any stage. Any kind of damage to nerves, arteries, smooth muscles due to diseases like diabetes, neurological disease, kidney disease etc can also result in erectile dysfunction. According to statistics, these kinds of diseases account for about 70 percent cases of erectile dysfunction. It can also be caused as a side effect of some surgery which damages nerves around penis or medication of common diseases like blood pressure. Around 20% cases of erectile dysfunction are due to psychological factors like stress, guilt, depression and anxiety.
A variety of treatments are available to overcome impotency. One can choose from various alternatives like psychotherapy, drug therapy, vacuum devices, or surgery. The most widely accepted method is the drug therapy. These drugs used for curing erectile dysfunction can either be consumed orally or injected directly into the penis.
Drugs like Generic Cialis and Generic Viagra including Kamagra are becoming immensely popular. If we take example of France, Cilalis has replaced Viagra in most of the France pharmacies. It is available in about 100 countries. You can buy generic Cialis from FDA approved medical stores or licensed online pharmacies. Generic Cialis is taken an hour before indulging into sexual activities to get the required sexual stimulation.
It won’t be wrong to say that drugs like Generic Cialis have been instrumental in restoring self respect and excitement in many lives.
